DEAR PAWNEE,
  I AM SO BROKEN HEARTED. WE LOVED KELLY DEARLY AND WE
ARE  GRATEFUL THAT HE COMMUNICATED TO YOU THAT HE WAS THE HAPPIEST HE HAD EVER BEEN AND FELT LOVED. BECAUSE HE TRULY WAS THE DEAREST FRIEND I HAD EVER HAD. HE WAS SO PRECIOUS TO ME.

LONNIE AND I WENT TO PRESIDIO ON HIS BIRTHDAY, MONDAY THE 9TH. WE TOOK HIM A NEW PHONE BECAUSE THE OLD ONE QUIT WORKING. WE EXPECTED TO TAKE HIM TO DINNER, BUT HE WAS LAYING DOWN AND DIDN'T FEEL UP TO IT. HE TOLD US THAT HE HAD A HEART ATTACK 9 DAYS EARLIER AND WAS FASTING. I DIDN'T THINK THAT WAS WISE, BUT YOU OF ALL PEOPLE KNOW
HOW SET IN HIS WAYS HE WAS.

  YOU SEE, LONNIE AND I HAD GONE INTO TOWN FOR A BITE TO EAT AND I INSISTED ON GOING BACK TO THE RANCH TO TELL KELLY "GOODBYE". LONNIE SAID NOT TO BOTHER HIM AND LET HIM REST, BECAUSE WE WOULD SEE HIM IN A WEEK.  I SAID "NO, I DON'T FEEL THAT I WILL EVER SEE HIM AGAIN" I ALREADY KNEW. BUT THE STRANGEST THING HAPPENED WHEN WE GOT BACK TO THE RANCH. KELLY'S DOGS,WOLF, WIZARD AND GRACIE, WHO KNOW ME VERY WELL, WOULD NOT LET ME IN. THEY LAID SIDE BY SIDE AT THE TOP OF THE STEPS, STARED HARD, GROWLED AND WOULD NOT LET ME PASS. I HOLLERED INTO KELLY THAT WE WERE GOING BACK TO EL PASO, BUT GOT NO RESPONSE. MAYBE KELLY DIDN'T WANT A FINAL GOODBYE, OR THE DOGS WERE JUST INSURING HIS REST. I GUESS I'LL NEVER KNOW. BUT THAT IS WHEN I TOOK THE OPPORTUNITY TO GATHER EVERYONE'S TELEPHONE NUMBERS. MAYBE THAT'S WHAT THE RETURN TRIP WAS FOR.
 
I CHECKED ON HIM ON WEDNESDAY AND KAY TOLD ME THAT HE HAD FELT WELL ENOUGH TO GO TO BREAKFAST 2 DAYS IN A ROW.
 
HE CALLED ME ON THURSDAY TO LET ME KNOW HE WAS FEELING BETTER AND WOULD CALL ME AFTER HE REGAINED SOME STRENGTH..
 
HE REACHED OUT FOR HELP @ 2:22 am SUNDAY, BUT I COULD NOT GET TO IT IN TIME BEFORE IT WENT TO VOICE MAIL. BY THE SOUND OF HIS VOICE ON VOICE MAIL, I KNEW HE WAS IN TROUBLE.  BY 2;25AM, I HAD CALLED KAY AND FOLLOWED THAT WITH A CALL TO TERRY. KAY, DAVID AND TERRY WENT TO HIM IMMEDIATELY AND STAYED WITH HIM UNTIL HE PASSED.
 
TERRY SAID HOW GRATEFUL THEY WERE TO GET THE CALL AND BE THERE WITH HIM SO HE DID NOT DIE ALONE. I KNOW HE FELT CHERISHED AND LOVED TO THE VERY END.

I LOVED HIM WITH ALL MY HEART AND WILL MISS HIM TERRIBLY. LONNIE LOVED HIM SO MUCH AND IS SO STRICKEN WITH GRIEF. HE TOLD KELLY THAT HE WOULD BE BACK TO SEE HIM THIS WEEK AND KELLY WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.
 
KELLY TOLD ME THAT HE HAD THE FIRST HEART ATTACK WHILE SHOEING HIS HORSE.  THERE WAS JUST NO SLOWING HIM DOWN. HE LEFT THIS EARTH DOING EXACTLY AS HE WANTED TO. WHAT A BLESSING.

CAROL and LONNIE

CAROL'S LETTER